Hello friends. It's me again.
Today I'd like to discuss the uproar that began with the passage of legislation in North Carolina requiring people to use only the bathroom that corresponds to their anatomy and removing the protections afforded to transgender individuals who use the bathroom that corresponds to their gender. The uproar was twofold - civil rights groups protested the 'barbaric' legislation that denied members of the transgender community the right to use the bathroom they felt most comfortable in; i.e. the bathroom that matches their gender, if not their anatomy. Then, proponents of the legislation made the claim that by allowing transgender people to choose their bathroom, that would open the door for anyone to choose their bathroom. Further, this would allow child molesters and rapists to use women's bathrooms because "they could just claim that they, too, are women and we would be powerless to stop them from assaulting us and molesting our daughters."
I would now like to explain a few things and set a few myths straight.
Repealing this legislation would NOT allow men to use women's bathrooms, or women to use men's bathrooms. That separation is still sacred. Repealing the law would reinstate the protections given to transgender people who may be reported for being in the 'wrong' bathroom. In fact, at least twelve states currently have laws prohibiting discrimination in public accommodations (bathrooms, locker rooms, etc.). None of those twelve states has had an increase in rates of sexual assault in bathrooms and locker rooms due to the passage of the non-discrimination laws. Put another way - your bathroom is still as safe as it ever was, and allowing transgender people to use their preferred bathroom has not created spikes in rates of rape or molestation in public bathrooms. (source)
May I suggest that the fear is partially misplaced? Fox News (and other right-wing media sources) are working overtime to create fear of transgender people and sex offenders masquerading as transgender. They want you to believe that a criminal lurks around every stall door and that non-discrimination laws will give them free reign over your safe bathroom. What they never report, however, is the reality: transgender individuals are one of the groups most likely to be sexually assaulted. The most recent statistics report that about 50% experience at least one sexual assault or one instance of sexual abuse in his or her lifetime. This rate is even higher for transgender people of color, transgender people with disabilities, and transgender youth (in other words, populations that are double minorities) (source). And what is one location in which these assaults occur?
Bathrooms.
Why are we not equally concerned with the safety of transgender people in the bathroom? I understand the protective instinct toward one's children and loved ones. However, surveys consistently show that LGBTQ people experience sexual assault at much higher rates than children and straight women. I'm not saying that it doesn't happen. I am saying that we should be just as concerned for the safety of populations who are at increased risk for violence. "Bathroom legislation" forces transgender individuals to use a facility where they are not necessarily welcomed by other users. In fact, this sort of legislation may even cause increased panic, as people who appear outwardly to be men are forced to use the women's bathroom because they have a vagina. It's even more dangerous in reverse: a person who looks like a woman outwardly is, by the sole criterion of having a penis, forced to use the men's bathroom. Historically, men have not reacted well to other men dressed as women and/or acting like women. Many perpetrators use that premise as an excuse for assaulting a transgender woman - "He was dressed like a woman, he was asking for it," "He's confused and I set him straight," etc.
Now, some groups have advocated for the creation of single-stall "trans-friendly" bathrooms for transgender people to use in public places like schools, offices, sporting arenas, etc. On its face, this seems reasonable. Special bathrooms would give transgender people a bathroom to use where they can feel safe and where cisgender people (those whose anatomy matches their gender) can be assured of the continued sanctity of their men's and women's bathrooms.
Think about it a little more, though. White lawmakers in the pre-Civil Rights Era made the same argument for 'colored bathrooms' and segregated, 'separate but equal' schools. Their attitude was the same: Blacks now have their own set of facilities where they can be with people like them, and Whites will not have to fear for their own safety.
Single-stall bathrooms rob transgender individuals of their gender identity. Single-stall bathrooms say, "You don't know what your gender is, so you have to use this gender-irrelevant bathroom." Let me be clear - transgender people have a gender. They are not somewhere in between male and female while being fully neither. You're thinking of gender-fluid. A common experience for a transgender person is to feel betrayed by his or own body. A boy 'on the inside' will feel betrayed by a body that develops breasts and hips. A girl 'on the inside' will feel betrayed by a body that won't stop growing hair and a voice that sounds so different from her inner voice. For these people, the physical sex organ does not define their gender. And really, cisgender people don't form their gender identity solely by their physical parts either - factors like feelings, interests, and perceptions contribute to gender identity too. Why, then, do we force transgender people to determine their gender identity solely on the basis of their physical parts?
Let's talk about perpetrators of sexual crimes. The biggest fear in this hysteria around bathroom laws is that child molesters will be allowed access to our children. However, 86% of child sexual abuse victims know their abuser (source). In addition, 80% child sexual assaults occurs at the home of the victim, the abuser, or another familiar home setting (source). A child is far more likely to be abused by a family member, a teacher, coach, religious leader, or even another kid, than by a stranger. Again, I'm not saying that it doesn't happen. The unfortunate truth, though, is that abuse and assault happens overwhelmingly in familiar settings at the hands of someone known to the victim. It would stand to reason, then, that we should be just as concerned (or more so) with teaching our kids about boundaries, appropriate vs. inappropriate ways to show affection, and how to ask for help.
And what about our young sons who use the men's room alongside adult men? These are theoretically some of the same men who would try to access the women's bathroom by claiming to be transgender. Pedophiles target boys, too, and boys are significantly less likely to report the abuse. But why are we not just as outraged that it is legal for men who could be pedophiles to use the same bathrooms as young boys? Given that only 20% of abuse occurs in locations other than residences, with schools and religious centers being the most common in that 20%, what reason do we have to be terrified that non-discrimination policies for public bathrooms would cause child molesters to come out en masse to target little girls in the women's bathroom?
Here's a revolutionary idea - sexual abuse and assault is not the problem. It is a problem, without a doubt, but it's also a symptom of a much larger problem: a culture in which violence against women is widespread yet unacknowledged, and where victims (not the abusers) are held responsible for the assaults due to their actions, inactions, clothing choices, or lifestyles. Society puts so much emphasis on telling victims, "don't get raped," when we should be telling perpetrators "don't rape." But it never goes that way, does it? The recent bathroom hysteria is a prime example - conservative lawmakers restrict the rights of transgender people under the pretense of protecting women and girls from being assaulted. I don't hear them nearly as upset about the people who are doing the assaulting. It reminds me a bit of their argument against gun control - violence is going to happen anyway, might as well make it easier for people to protect themselves. That's fine, but why can't we also make an effort to curtail (or even stop) the violence itself, especially when the efforts at 'protection' of one group come at the expense of the protection of another group?
If you take away only one thing from this piece, let it be this - bathroom laws do far more harm than good. Everyone has the right to not be assaulted in the bathroom. Everyone also has the right to feel safe in the bathroom, including transgender individuals. Forcing everyone to use the bathroom that corresponds to their anatomy forces transgender people to use facilities with members of the opposite gender. Ironically, this is the same occurrence that many conservatives claim would happen in the absence of bathroom laws.
It simply goes to show that some people still seem to deserve more rights than others in this country.
