The Woman of Noble Character, Day 1

About two weeks ago, a wise friend of mine sent me this text after I told her lonely I felt amid all of the engagement and wedding notices:
"The thing I always remind msyelf is how mad I'll be that I wasted all this time worrying about a man! Either when I do get married, or when I end a successful life single, I'll be irritated that worry took away so much of my life. I do NOT want that regret hanging over my head!"
Well. That is not what I wanted to hear.

At the time.

The more I thought about it, the more I knew, OF COURSE, that she was right. Why worry about something that's not happening for me just because it's happening for someone else? Why am I taking this as confirmation that it's never going to happen for me when I don't know that to be true?

So, born out of all these swirling doubts, a new series: The Woman of Noble Character from Proverbs 31. (Now, I realize that in the Bible it actually says the Wife of Noble Character, but I figure that we are women foremost, and why not strive for noble character before we get married?)

Day 1: She Inspires Confidence

A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value. [31:10-11]

Full confidence. He trusts her with everything because he is confident in her abilities and her character. Not only her husband, but everyone in her life has full confidence in her. 

Now, I don't know about you, but I don't inspire full confidence in myself. My irrational emotional side finds it hard to imagine that I inspire confidence in anyone else. My rational logical side knows that that can't be true. Parents trust me with their kids at Bible School, my boss trusts me with the well-being and academic progress of her children, my cooperating teacher trusted me with her 150 students last semester, and my friends trust me with their hearts. But it's the classic battle: my head knows what my heart finds so hard to accept.

But thankfully, God has full confidence in me. He knows what I'm capable of because He created in me everything that I am. He knows where I've been and where I'm going. He knows what holds me back and pushes me through it. He knows who's broken me and who's built me. Best of all, He knows me at my best and at my worst and loves me anyway. 

This is the promise I cling to: "I who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it." You know what that means? It doesn't matter if I screw up! God brings the good work out anyway! That means that there isn't anything I can do to destroy God's good work in me. 

My confidence in myself should come from His confidence in me. On some level, I've always known that, but it's taken the last couple of years and some reading of Proverbs 31 to make it sink in a little further. 

Shall we pray?

God...I pray that you would build your confidence in me. Help me to remember that I need to find my confidence in you. Some days it's really hard for me to remember that I'm worth it because the world is doing its best to tear me apart. Please lend me your strength and understanding. Help me to remember who I am: a child you have invested in and poured yourself into. Thank you for who you are and your faithfulness. I love you my abba.